The Exodus That Never Came
by trqfan
Summary: What is the Exodus on New Caprica came much later. Would something bloom between Kara Thrace and her cylon captor Leoben? Rated T for possible future content.
1. Holding Hands

Summary: Exodus comes much later to New Caprica. This picks up right after Kacey falls down the stairs.

Authors Note: The usual BS - I don't own BSG nor will I ever own BSG (sadly). All chapters are in Kara POV unless otherwise noted.

* * *

**Chapter 1**

As Kacey opens her eyes I instinctively reach back to take it's hand. I forgot for one split second that Leoben is keeping me captive, all I care about is my daughter. Our daughter? No she is mine, that thing can't have children.

As he starts rubbing his thumb against my hand I realize what is happening and I snatch it away immediately.

"Stop" I whispered not wanting to upset Kacey.

"You took my hand Kara" Leoben said questioningly.

"I know, I didn't mean it."

"It's okay Kara, one day you will you hold me and mean it. I've seen it."

"Please just go so I can be with my daughter."

I watch as Leoben goes to the kitchen without a fight and start to make dinner.

"Hi Kacey, honey, I'm so glad you are awake. You don't know how much you worried me." I say as I run my hand through her soft blonde hair. "Mommy won't let anything else happen to you."

"Who are you?" Kacey asks me with her voice barely above a whisper.

"I'm your mother honey. We've been apart for a few years but not anymore"

"Kara" Leoben calls from the kitchen "dinner is ready."

"Come on Kacey, it's time for dinner." For the first time that I can remember being held in this place I'm looking forward to dinner. The first dinner with my daughter.

"Thank you Leoben," I say with almost full sincerity.

We eat in silence until I remember that there is only one bedroom and three of us.

"Where is Kacey going to sleep?" I ask him. " I sleep on the couch and you have the bed."

"The bed is always open for you Kara, it was made for us to share. But, if you aren't going to share our bed Kacey can."

"No, my daughter is not going to be sleeping next to you every night. That is not an option!"

I turn to Kacey and luckily she is engrossed with dinner and not listening to us argue.

"Kara, she is OUR daughter, there are two options here: either you, Kacey, and I share the bed, or you take the couch and Kacey and I will share the bed."

"Fine we will all share the bed, don't think this means anything. She is hurt and I will not leave her alone with you." I normally would've killed him and just waited for him to come back, by then I could've been asleep. With Kacey in the room I can no longer kill Leoben, one of the things I actually looked forward to in this damn dollhouse.

Leoben doesn't say anything, he just sits there eating with a smug smile on his face. He finally got something he always wanted and there was nothing I can do about it.

* * *

A/N: Sorry for all the dialogue! There should be less of it in the upcoming chapters. Give me your feedback it's appreciated!


	2. The Fort

**Chapter 2**

I open my eyes and my new found motherly instincts kicked in, where was Kacey? Better question where was the toaster? When I went to sleep last night I made sure that Kacey was as far away as Leoben as possible, even if it mean that I had to be closer the frakking toaster and now they are both missing. How did they get out of the bed without me waking up? Did that asshole drug me, or did I sleep soundly for the first time in months? I expected that he would've gotten grabby in the middle of the night but he stayed on his side of the bed and didn't touch me all night.

"Kacey!" I yell as I hear her laughing out in the living room.

"Kara" Leoben whispers while knocking on the door "can I come in? I've mad breakfast and I need to go out so you need to watch Kacey."

"Yeah I'm coming out, just go and do whatever it is the hell you cylons do."

I pull on the bathrobe that I've worn numerous times. Mostly after I have to wash Leoben's blood off my hands, something I wish I could do more often. He is still standing there when I exit the bedroom.

"I've left some food that you can cook for lunch, without knives or anything like that."

"I'm not going to kill you, not with Kacey around anyway. Believe me I want to, but I can't put her through that. So just leave so I can spend the day with Kacey, locked in this apartment, as usual..."

"Fine. I'll be back later. I may even bring you a present or two"

I watch him walk up the steps and out the door, and I feel a little hand take mine.

"Good morning Kacey." I reach down to pick her up and realize just how long I've been locked up in here. Know that I haven't been working out she is a lot harder to pick up than she would've been back on Galactica.

"Leoben made breakfast, let's eat! What did he make today huh?" Two plates were set up on the table. When did he have time to get a highchair and settings for a child? I place Kacey in her chair and sit down in front of my plate. Eggs. One thing I've been meaning to ask the frakker is where they get all this food. I wonder if Kacey has had 'real' food before, she was raised by cylons and from what it seems they have an endless supply of produce and meat.

"Honey do you like eggs?"

"What are eggs?" she asks. "Mommy never had eggs to give me."

I guess that answers my question. Wait mommy?

"Kacey I'm your mommy. That other lady was not your mom, she was a cylon." I say while tapping her on her cute button nose.

"Not my mommy." she says to me with stern conviction.

"Okay..." she will come to realize soon that I am her mother...I hope. "Well Kacey lets eat breakfast and then we can find something to do today."

We eat in silence. I thought kids never stopped talking. Maybe she is scared of this new place, who knows where she had been living for the past three years.

I don't bother with the washing up, I will let Leoben do that. I start searching through the closets for anything that I can use to entertain her. Most are empty save a few clothes here and there. I go into the bedroom closet looking for extra sheets. Gotcha a linen closet with three extra sets of bedding.

"Kacey! We're going to make a fort."

I run out of the bedroom to find that somehow Kacey had gotten herself out of her highchair. Noted- not a safe place to leave her.

"Kacey, you have to be careful, you may fall and hurt yourself again. Come on hon lets make a fort."

I hand her one of the sheets and I watch her grab it and take off. Looks like she knows what she is doing.

***A FEW HOURS LATER***

Kacey and I were awoke by the door being unlocked. We had crawled under our fort and after hours of running around and playing with the few toys she had we both crawled onto the couch and fell asleep.

"Kara, I'm home...what on earth have you guys done?"

"We made a fort" Kacey yells out before I have the chance to open my mouth.

"I can see that. Why don't you and Kara come out and look at what I've brought you."

She starts crawling out from underneath the mass of sheets hanging all around. I follow her out, last time he brought me something it was a daughter, can't be anything bigger than that.

I watch him as he walks down the stairs with a brown box. Children 's toys were peeking out from the top.

"Want to see what I got you Kacey? If you do sit at the table with Kara."

Her little hand reaches up to grab mine and she pulls me towards the table. I sit down and pull her up onto my lap.

"Okay Leoben show us what you got" bitterness drips from my words. He is going to buy our daughter over with gifts, he can't love so what other option does he have.

He puts the box down and starts pulling stuffed animals, blocks, and other toys, some clothes from Kacey out of it. Then he pulls a plant, a single pot with some dirt and a small green stock.

"Kara," he says "this is for you" I take the pot from his hands. "I know you want to go outside, and one day we will be able too, but until then I thought I could bring a bit of the outside to you."

I start to tear up. I try to stop them, I don't want to show him how much this one little plant means to me. Seeing that green stem popping out of the soil tells me that life is still continuing outside.

"Thank you Leoben." I whisper, hopefully quiet enough so that he can't hear me.

"You're welcome Kara"

He cups my face with his hand and wipes away one of the tears that fell down my cheek. I flinch and he pulls his hand away.

"I will go make some dinner, clean this fort up so we have somewhere to sit tonight.

* * *

My finals are coming up so there may not be an update until afterward!

Reviews are greatly appreciated - as well as CONSTRUCTIVE criticism!


	3. Pajamas

Authors Note: Okay guys sorry for the random change in tense. I was finding it difficult to write in the first person view of Starbuck. So it has changed from first person! Sorry.

Also finals are over so the chapters won't be spaced out as much! I apologize for the shortness of my chapters.

* * *

Kara placed the tiny potted plant on the nightstand next to the bed, if she was going to be sleeping in here regularly she wanted the 'outside' as close as possible. She touched the soft leaf that was sprouting from the stock wondering where the frakker got it from. She never asked him where he got anything, the food, clothes, now the plant, and Kacey where had she been for the past few years?

"Leoben" Kara called as she walked out of the bedroom "where do you get all of this stuff? The food, clothes, this plant. And where was Kacey for the past what four years?"

"Kara, everything is from the cylon ships, and as for Kacey she was raised by a number six before you. Which explains why she is so smart, she is part cylon and raised by one. She got her fighting spirit from you though, must be in her genes."

Leoben went to the couch and sat next to Kacey. "That is one of the reasons I fell in love with you. Look how happy she is to be with us."

Kara looked down at Kacey, and she looked happy a big toothy grin was plastered on her face while looking up at Leoben. It was almost as if she knew he was her father even though she only has only lived with them a few days.

"Kawa" Kacey said, it was the first time she uttered that word.

"What is it Kacey" Starbuck said as she sat down on the opposite side of their daughter.

"Tired" and as if to prove her point she gave a big yawn.

"Alright let's put you to bed" Kara said while looking at Leoben. "Did you bring her pajamas?"

Leoben nodded, went over to the box and pulled out some pink pajamas.

"Here, come on let's go put her to sleep."

Kara didn't feel like protesting about both of them putting their daughter to sleep. It was a pointless argument that she knew she wouldn't win.

"Alright Kacey lets go" she gave a small grunt as she picked up Kacey and set her on her hip. "time for pj's then sleep"

As soon as Kacey was placed safely in bed they watched their daughter fall to sleep from the doorway. In that moment Kara forget where she was, who she was with, so much so that she didn't fight when Leoben placed his hand on her back and started to rub in circles.

"Kara, time for dinner. I will go start it."

He removed his hand from her back and turned towards the kitchen.

* * *

Review? Please!


	4. A shower

-A few weeks later-

* * *

Weeks had gone by and they fell into a comfortable routine. Wake up every morning in the same bed with Kacey tucked safely in Kara's arms. Leoben would get out of bed and make them all breakfast, they would sit at the table and make small talk about pointless things. Some days Leoben would leave and some days he would stay with them. One of them would make lunch, Leoben now trusted her with all the kitchen utensils. All of the free time was dedicated to Kacey, they had started to teach her simple things like counting and the colors. Leoben would make dinner and the day would end with them going to sleep.

Kara was slowly starting to enjoy life in the dollhouse, when she got to happy she forced herself to remember where she was. She feared that if she became to blissful that she would not want to leave the dollhouse that Leoben kept her in.

One day, about a month into Kaceys appearance, Kara woke up with Leoben's arm wrapped around her torso. What scared the once strong and defiant fighter pilot, is that she didn't mind, in fact it made her feel safe. Her mind was racing, trying to shove him out and all the memories on the Galactica back in. She went back to the time she met Sam, her husband, it should be her husband's arm around her waist, he should be the one making her feel safe. She remembered Lee, hot headed Lee Adama. Kara pushed Leoben's arm off her waist and slid out of bed without waking up Kacey. She needed a shower, she needed to rinse off him and the feelings that started growing.

The sound of the shower woke Leoben, this was not part of their routine, she never took a shower this early in the morning. He got out of bed and knocked lightly on the door.

"Kara, are you okay?" Leoben asked.

"Yes" she said through tears.

"Kara, I can hear you crying. Can I come in?"

"No, no. I will be right out."

She turned the water off and donned her bathrobe. He was waiting there outside the bathroom door. He looked at her with genuine care and sadness.

"Please don't look at me like that, I can't have you looking at me like you care. You can't care, you are a robot and you can't have feelings. Please just say you don't have feelings." Kara begged on the verge of spilling more tears.

"What's wrong Kawa?" Kacey asked sleepily.

"Nothing honey, just go outside and play with your toys, mommy will be out soon. I have to get dressed."

Kara walked over to the side of the bed and kissed Kacey on top of her head.

"Mommy loves you."

Kacey left the room without uttering a response and Leoben turned his attention back to Kara.

"Kara, you should know by now that I do care, I love you, and one day you will love me."

He moved in to give her a hug, but she moved away, turning herself away from him.

"You can't love me," she whispered crying "just say you don't love me, I need to hear it."

"Why, why can't you believe me, why do you refuse to let me love you?"

"It scares me Leoben!' It scares me because then it means that this means something real. Living here with you and our daughter, it means that we have become a family. It scares me because I don't want to be my mother."

She broke down, tears falling without hesitation. She slid down the wall into a sitting position burying her head in her hands. Silently whispering to herself over and over "I can't." Leoben squatted to meet her at eye level.

"Hey, hey look at me" hey whispered lifting her chin with his hand. "I know what your mother did to you, and I promise, you will never be like her. I know it, you love Kacey and-"

She cut him off, she stopped him talking with a kiss. She pulled away horrified.

"I didn't, I mean I'm sorry, it doesn't mean anything. No, what I mean is, is, is, I don't know what it means."

"Kiss me again" he said

"No" she said with little defiance.

"Kiss me again" he repeated "Kiss me again Kara"

She reached up to touch his cheeks, she took them in both hands and kissed him. A light kiss, it lasted a mere second. She looked up at him, into his cool blue eyes and kissed him again. This time it wasn't a small peck. It was filled with passion, she wrapped her arms around his neck pulling him closer. He placed on hand on her back lifting her up to him. She let out a small moan when he nipped at her top lip. She couldn't stop herself, she knew it was wrong and that she shouldn't like it, but she didn't. She wanted this. She wanted him.

"I'm hungry!" Kacey yelled from the living room.

They froze. Looked at each other and pulled apart. She had never felt more ashamed in her life. She kissed a frakking toaster, and she liked. Worse was that she wanted to do it again. At that moment she made a promise to herself that it wouldn't happen again. She couldn't, she wouldn't allow herself to get wrapped up in his warped little world.

"I'm going to make breakfast" Leoben said pulling her out of her thoughts.

He kissed her once on the forehead and walked out to greet Kacey.

* * *

Two chapters in one day! Forgive the grammar mistakes - it's not my forte.


End file.
